Originally I did not want to write this post. I was worried about branding myself as an introvert and I didn’t want to pigeonhole myself in that way. But I realized that I need to know who I am because how will I grow and become less self conscious and more self aware? My introvertedness is a part of my personality and I should know more about that trait. So like any self actualizing seeker I took the Myers Briggs personality test. I found out some things I already knew about myself and some things I didn’t. All of this information led me to ask myself one very important question, “Am I an introverted extrovert or an extroverted introvert?”
To answer this I had to first find out my Myers Briggs classification. I am an INFJ, Introvert, iNtuitive, Feeling, Judging. However, because my Judging percentage was small I can also be classified as a INFP, the P is for Perceiving. INFJ’s are sometimes mistaken for extroverts because we can adapt well in social settings but we still choose to only open up to a few close family and friends. To get even more in depth I am 22% Introvert, 12% iNtuitive, 25% Feeling, and 1% Judging/Perceiving. I totally understand why I’m 25% feeling because if you ask any of my friends they’ll tell you that I live on Moody Street. (This is a real street by the way and if the sign ever goes missing just know that I stole it.) What can I say?
When I share what I’m feeling I only do it with those that I am closest to, which is a select few. Most of the time I hold things in but I’m learning to stop that practice, it isn’t healthy. On more than one occasion I’ve let a problem eat me up inside until it explodes, usually in the form of an exhausting anxiety attack. I try not to shut people out but it’s hard to be vulnerable sometimes because it is often mistaken for weakness. I know this isn’t true though because being vulnerable is one of the bravest things someone can do. I’m not saying I’m gonna start pouring my soul out to strangers on the street but I am going to make an attempt to open up to those who are important to me.
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So I discovered that I am definitely an introverted extrovert. I came to this conclusion because I am capable of being the social butterfly. I can turn to a stranger at the party and ask them the basic getting to know you questions, “Name, major, where they’re from, etc,” but only when I really want to. Other times I can sit in the corner by myself and be content in my quietness. It really just depends on the day or night. It’s the almond joy dichotomy, “Sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I don’t.” I’m going to continue reading up on this topic because it’s really interesting to me and I like learning new things about myself because I’m great and if you took the time to read this then you are too!
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